What begins as a little favor can sometimes turn out to become stressful and overwhelming. Whether from expectations of others or expectations put on ourselves; we should protect ourselves from being taken for granted.
We often place everyone else’s needs before our own. It’s time to access why that’s happening. Once you gain more clarity, you can set a plan in place, so you get treated fairly.
There will sometimes be situations where we feel unappreciated. It may be at home, within our circle of friends or professional life. Being taken for granted feels terrible. Below are a few tips to help break the pattern and redirect your energy toward improving your life experiences.
1: Set Your Limits
It is crucial to set boundaries. You may be delighted to do for others, but does it steal the valuable time you need? Do you even do things you despise to make others happy?
A compromise might be an option, but sometimes there isn’t a compromise, and that’s when to set boundaries. Saying “no” will become much more comfortable with practice.
Setting limits teaches people what is okay and what’s not. No matter how much they push, it’s crucial to remain firm and uphold your boundaries.
You can buy yourself some time to think by saying you’ll get back to them. You can phone later when you’re feeling stronger, or text your answer instead of being face to face.
You may feel guilty or awkward in the beginning, but it will get easier!
2: Learn To Say No, And Mean It
Do you feel like you you can’t just say no? It may sound or feel selfish to you, but there are times when we need to say “no,” and that’s okay! Every time you do something that you do not want to do, it damages your self-confidence and can leave you feeling anxious.
Try not to hesitate to tell people how you feel. If you choose to say no, then it should be so. Remember to be firm and not over-apologize. Don’t be afraid just because you think the person(s) may get offended; it is not wise to try to please someone at the cost of your happiness.
Life becomes better for everyone once boundaries are in place; it can help eliminate any misunderstandings or grey areas, and in turn, help avoid disagreements.
Putting your foot down will be the most challenging part. By saying no, it shows that you have a plan and goals that are of importance to you. Clearly expressing those needs will eliminate misunderstanding and help you feel confident.
3. Plan For Your Time Well
Failing to make a good plan for your day can be a reason for someone to take advantage of you. Make yourself busy, plan your time, and you’ll less likely be a target. For instance, if you know you can’t find time for someone or for some work someone wants to give you; tell them your time frame won’t allow you to do that.
Sometimes, people may also be used to your routine, and it just becomes automatic for them to expect you to do for them. Instead, make yourself unavailable at those times. Once they get accustomed to doing it without you, they will stop asking and expecting.
Volunteering, exercising, taking classes, or finding a new hobby are great ways to push yourself into doing more for yourself and finding your passions. You will find yourself happier and have less time to do the work of others you don’t want to do.
4. Don’t Be Afraid of Offending Them
You are rejecting the ask, not the person. People are not as upset as we think they are when we say no. Your friends, family, or co-workers will respect you and learn only to ask things of you occasionally and things that they feel you are capable of doing.
Now; some people would want you to do everything for them, unreasonably, and will get offended if you don’t do what they want. If it means that someone doesn’t stick around, then your better without that kind of personality in your life. Don’t let them manipulate or pressure you. It is not your responsibility to fix all of their problems.
Just because someone expects something from you doesn’t mean you have to deliver.
Each of us have only our own life to live. If our time gets used up, we can’t get it back. Time is a commodity that is not replaceable. Enjoy your time. Do what you want with your life. You can still help others when, and if, it works comfortably into your life.
You will likely find that people have more respect for you when you choose to respect yourself. You deserve to enjoy your life!